Saturday, 13 February 2010

Size; Is it really everything?

Whoever said size didn't matter didn't know what the hell they were talking about. Size is everything.

Whether it's portion control or shopping for clothes and everything else inbetween, size can make or break you.

This past week I've eaten huge portions of 'beige' food. Pastry, chips, cake, potatoes, pasta, you name it, I've gobbled it down like I'll never see food again and now I'm left feeling bloated and sluggish and more than a little bit guilty for my gluttony. Tomorrow is back to the usual regime of home made soups & salads and barely a carb in sight. I've made a decision not to take my weekly trip to the scales on Monday as I don't want to see the LCD flash 3 or 4lbs in the wrong direction. BIG portions = low self esteem.

Now when it comes to men, size is also a huge issue. I'm not talking about penis size here, although that is absolutely important. Infact, I remember once going out with a guy I'd fancied for ages. We had a great night, good food, lots of chat a few drinks but not too many...and then it came to the inevitable tearing each others clothes off in the hallway scenario. The tension between us had been building for some months before this moment and I can't tell you the disappointment I felt upon seeing his less than impressive member. He was an extremely good looking guy with a great physique but any desire I felt was gone in the blink of an eye so the sex for me was a case of going through the motions whilst thinking of excuses not to see him again if he asked. Which he did.

Anyway, I digress...the main issue I'm having with regards to men and size is the business of height. Scotland seems to have a higher than average population of male midgets. I'm not tall, 5ft 2" but I do like a man to be taller than me, even when I'm wearing heels which lets face it, will only increase my stature to 5ft 6" at the most. Where are all the tall single guys? I'm not looking for much, I'm long enough in the tooth to know that Mr. Perfect doesn't actally exist but I would like Mr. Potenial. I have an open mind and I don't have a preference for hair, eye colour, or a body like adonis but the whole height thing is a real stumbling block. I do want a man to be manly and for me that equates to height. I'm fully aware this might sound crazy and irrational to some but short men just don't rock my boat, no matter how charming, funny, wealthy they may be. For some reason short men seem to be attracted to me. Why is this? I'm going to start wearing a sign saying 'If you're less that 5ft 10" please don't approach me as refusal often offends'.

Today my search for the right bra size has also been like searching for the Holy Grail. Being in the market for some new lingerie, I decided to take my boosoms to be measured. I am a 34F but depending on the style and brand of bra this may well vary very slightly which involves trying on half a department store. With bras in abundance I set about looking for the usual functional smooth t-shirt bra, the strapless bra and then the sexy bra. I left the house at 10.30am, I got home at tea-time. I don't know which took more time. Sifting through racks trying to find my elusive size or trying all my selections on. It's an exhausting and costly business. But when it comes to bras, size is everything. No-one wants badly supported & drooping knockers, or that ghastly 4 boob look caused when the cup size is too small. Then there's the checking of the bulges elsewhere. Having made my purchases I came home and had to have a ruthless clearout of the underwear drawer in order to fit all the new under garments in. Does the charity shop accept 2nd hand bras in good condtion?

Size does matter. Case closed.

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